Michelle SalujaMaybe you've been in therapy. Maybe you've read the books, developed the language, built the self-awareness. You have, in the quiet of your own life, begun to feel like a different woman than the one you used to be.
Michelle SalujaThere is something that happens around this time of year that most people don't talk about. The days get a little shorter. The light changes — it becomes softer, more slanted, less certain.
Michelle SalujaThere is a concept in psychology that has changed the lives of many of the women I work with, and it is this: you did not get what you needed as a child.
Michelle SalujaGuilt, in its healthy form, is a signal. It tells you that your actions may have conflicted with your values, gives you information, and invites correction. It is meant to be temporary, proportional, and actionable.
Michelle SalujaMany of us leave that window of tolerance open way to wide. We shouldn't have to tolerate something in order to gain love.